Archive for the Category »Stress «

The perfect mix

17 Aug 2009 by Leish

We were privileged to spend a week with our dear friends and my beautiful brother, Marlon, at Umngazi River Bungalows.  We also got to meet Solveig (Marlon’s gorgeous girlfriend).  Jords and Carli were in their element as they spent time with “Grim” and Mich, Zara and Kinvarah, and of course their uncle and Solveig.  I could never find them during the week and when I did I literally had to force myself onto them to get a kiss or a hug or a “howzit mom”…….. I loved watching them go about their business in the company of people that gave them so much love and attention and that they were completely comfortable with. Of course the secure environment made all the difference.

What would it take for us to create this idyllic situation back home?  The right mix of people with the right amount of love, the right amount of space to explore and create some independence, and a safe environment to learn and experience life in its fullness and beauty.  Would be nice?

Category: Activities, Children, Education, Parents, Schools, Stress  One Comment

Social Interactions

25 Jul 2009 by Leish

I remember when I was in Std 4 and 5 (Grade 6 and 7) – I seemed to always be in the middle of a ‘friend crisis’. My best friend would change daily. If it wasn’t Paula, then it was Cathy. If it wasn’t Cathy then it was Mel. And if it wasn’t Mel it was probably Paula again. It often depended on whose house I was going to play at or who I would be sleeping over at on the weekend. I do remember feeling secure and at peace when I had a special friend to rely on. One that I would be sure would play with me at break or sit with me on the bus. One that would send notes during class and that would dress the same as me when we went to a party. So yes at the age of 11 or 12 I was thrown into the deep end of my social interactions with friends.

Jordie’s teacher called in a little group of girls from her Grade (Grade 3) last week to try ‘sort out’ the social dynamics that were happening amongst them. She used the example of division. Much to these little girl’s amusement. How if you choose to leave someone out it would mean that they would be the remainder in a division sum and how do you think that would feel?

Of course I was expecting my girls to find themselves in a place of trying to work out where they fit into their friendship group. Searching for a little understanding of how to be and what to say to be accepted and liked for who they are. And also to learn how to be confident in who they are and what they have to offer that may be uniquely them. I want them to believe in who they are so that they can choose their friends and still be kind and good to others around them. I just didn’t expect things to get so hectic so quickly.

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Moments of silence

04 Jul 2009 by Leish

Carli has been so sick this week.  A serious bout of flu and inflamed tonsils has reduced my usually content and energetic little girl into a bundle of coughing, spluttering, high temperatures and FLATNESS. 
In the busyness of taking care of her, day and night: changing her clothing after a vomit, giving her medicine, trying to get her to eat something, placing a wet facecloth on her forehead to help bring down her temperature: I had moments of silence…… 
Sitting with Carli in my arms gave me a sense of feeling completely content. This is where I had to be in this moment.  As much as I would’ve taken her pain and discomfort away from her in a flash, I was grateful for the opportunity to just be, without wondering if I should be doing more!

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One of those days….

30 May 2009 by Leish

I’m having one of those days where I feel pulled.  A bunch of voices calling for my attention and not being able to satisfy them all, least of all myself.

How do I do it? Jump on the trampoline, play baby baby, make lunch, check emails, get back to clients, be energetic and invest time in my family as a whole as well as in the individuals.  Me, I just want time to plan, write up a schedule, do the right thing for the right people at the right time.  Just to make sure that everyone else is happy.

It’s not a new scenario I’ve described.  Most of us as parents live with these demands.  Most of us feel desperate for more time, more energy, more patience to do things just right.  Most of us just feel desperate.

Category: Children, Parents, Stress  2 Comments